September 19, 2009
Obuevisly diet is a great thing if you want to… you know what you want:-) but don’t be so serious keeping your diet!:-)
If you eat something, and no one else sees you eat it, it has no calories.
When drinking a diet soda while eating a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled by the diet soda.
When you eat with someone else, calories don’t count as long as you don’t eat more than they do.
Foods used for medicinal purposes never count. Example: hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee cheesecake.
If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.
Movie-related foods do not have calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one’s personal fuel.
Example: Milk Duds, buttered popcorn, Junior Mints and Tootsie Rolls.
Cookie pieces contain no calories, because of the process of breaking the cookie causes calorie leakage.
If you are in the process of preparing something, foods licked off knives and spoons have no calories.
Foods of the same color have the same number of calories. Examples: green salad and Key Lime pie, mushrooms and white chocolate.
If you eat the food off someone else’s plate, it doesn’t count.
If you eat standing up the calories all go to your feet and get walked off.
Food eaten at Christmas parties has no calories, courtesy of Santa.
A diet is a weigh of life.
It’s not the minutes spent at the table that put on weight, it’s the seconds.
It’s something most of us do religiously: We eat what we want and pray we don’t gain weight.
The problem with curbing our appetites is that most of us do it at the drive in window of McDonalds.
The most fattening thing you can put in an ice cream sundae is a spoon.
The biggest drawback to fasting for seven days is that it makes one weak.
Sweets are the destiny that shapes our ends.
Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.
The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.
Diets are for women who not only kept their girlish figure bit doubled it.
A diet is when you have to go to some length to change your width.
Many women reduce and reduce, yet still never manage to become a bargain.
The best way to lose weight is by skipping … snacks and desert.
Most people gain weight by having intimate dinners for two…alone.
People go to Weight Watchers to learn their lessens.
A diet is the modern-day meal in which a family counts its calories instead of its blessings.
A diet is what you go on when not only can’t you fit into the store’s dresses, you can’t fit into the dressing room.
One guideline applies to fat and thin people alike: If you’re thin, don’t eat fast. If you’re fat, don’t eat – FAST.